A Programming Note

Dateline Washington F.U.N. - Due to unforseen circumstance beyond their control the Bush administration announced today that the Rapture has been rescheduled for next Tuesday. Sources close to the administration stated "They had no idea that Armageddon would be so difficult to bring about."

Another source speaking on conditions of anonymity suggested that there were some scheduling conflicts with Christ. Apparently today is the annual Black and White feather ball and as everyone knows this is the highlight of the social season in the Kingdom. Christ himself could not be reached for comment, but in a prepared statement a representative reiterated that the End of Days is an issue near and dear to his heart and he thanked all of those working so diligently to earn the mark of the Beast.